i have a bad habit.... i really bad one.
i hold grudges. i may not totally show it on the outside but on the inside, if someone wrongs me, i have a REALLY hard time forgetting it.
i've never admitted that before.
after some recent events (and by recent i mean the past two weeks or so) i've realized that this is a nasty habit and is so very unhealthy for me. since i've moved home from school, it's been a little easier for me to forget what has happened because i'm not seeing these people everyday. but i've also been working on how to deal with these people when i do see them again.
yesterday was one of those times. and i failed.
the moment i saw the person that hurt me... ice. there was not one word that i wanted to to say to that person. i didn't even want to look at them. and the entire time i was telling myself that i was being redic about the whole situation but all i could muster up was a half hearted smile.
THIS IS NOT ME!!!
i wish i could go back and change my behavior. i don't want to be remembered as a bitter person, it's just so hard when someone hurts you to want to show kindness to them.
but then something that one of my mom's best friends pops in my head. i remember her always telling me,
"honey, people are always gonna do you wrong, but you just always gotta remember to love big. that's all you can do."
she is such a wonderfully, fabulous, christian woman who i totally look up to.
my mom, being the amazing woman she is, tells me to pray, and pray harder for the people who hurt you because they need it the most.
i have such wonderful, strong women in my life.
well i'm going to leave yall with some inspirational quotes that i just love!